Carry on

[whipps]

Ok so while we wait for a new file lets write a story. Just carry it on....... There once was a little green frog named...

[Grandmama]

Ok so while we wait for a new file lets write a story. Just carry it on....... There once was a little green frog named...

Kermit....

[Zack1990]

... who was saving up his money for a sex change operation...

[whipps]

... who was saving up his money for a sex change operation...

but he didn't know if he had the balls to do it so he....

[Zack1990]

... discussed it on Oprah and she said....

[polarbear67`]

... discussed it on Oprah and she said....
she would give him a ball graft as she had such huge balls

[whipps]

... discussed it on Oprah and she said....

to find your true self you must go on this quest.....

[rriker111]

to find your true self you must go on this quest.....
get on to opra and she'll buy you some breasts

[Zack1990]

... your quest is to take my balls and my breasts and go back to your pond and search for my willy because ...

[CyberDavey]

the green frog..named Kermit, was astonished at what he saw

[polarbear67`]

yes it was his willy swimming free in the pond all by itself

[CyberDavey]

good thing I am an amphibian...I'll grow another he thought.....just then he heard a loud

[Grandmama]

Roar...Big boobs...big balls...no dick...total freak..now what??

[thuud]

the hell with oprah, now I can go on Jerry Springer...

[polarbear67`]

and off he rode on his trusty ....

[Grandmama]

Bike...peddlin' his ass with all of his might. Screamin' as he goes at those big oil companys..Bastards if it weren't for you my balls wouldn't be hangin'

[thuud]

and off he rode on his trusty ....

steed who was indeed in heat...

[polarbear67`]

Bike...peddlin' his ass with all of his might. Screamin' as he goes at those big oil companys..Bastards if it weren't for you my balls wouldn't be hangin'


Oh but scram as he may, and scream as he might
he still could not position his balls just right (on that bicycle seat that is)

[Grandmama]

So with a shift to the left and a shift to the right--well damn still can't get it right!

[whipps]

So with a shift to the left and a shift to the right--well damn still can't get it right!

..off the bike he fell right back into the pond where he started found a row boat to get across the pond with, Kermit jumps in rows across the pond when he stands up to get out unbeknowst to him his testicles are hooked in the ore lock when he stood up it gave him such a pull on his bag that he.....

[polarbear67`]

..off the bike he fell right back into the pond where he started found a row boat to get across the pond with, Kermit jumps in rows across the pond when he stands up to get out unbeknowst to him his testicles are hooked in the ore lock when he stood up it gave him such a pull on his bag that he.....


hollered the most ungodly sound ya ever heard come from a damn frog, as he grabbed at an oar to pry his poor trapped ball sack out from the oarlock, when along came Miss Piggy ......(magine that)

[whipps]

hollered the most ungodly sound ya ever heard come from a damn frog, as he grabbed at an oar to pry his poor trapped ball sack out from the oarlock, when along came Miss Piggy ......(magine that)

Kermi she cried, what happened to your pea shaped green balls.......

[thuud]

oh my, they're as big as a honey dew, I bet they taste sweet too...

[whipps]

oh my, they're as big as a honey dew, I bet they taste sweet too...

..so into her mouth they went, when all of the sudden...

[FUNK695]

we saw some hindu banna kush loaded into a bong........:new_all_c


Edit:i just saved this poor guy.lmao

[polarbear67`]

and Miss Piggy being the piggy she is, spit out the nuts and grabbed the bong

[FUNK695]

Sliding the whole bong down her throght like it was ron jeremy, she sucked on the bong until white goodness came out of the tip of it and she swallowed:eek::psmiley31:new_all_c

[Zack1990]

but Kermi's sacks, stretched as they are, swing right round 'is crotch and plug up the bong...

[whipps]

but Kermi's sacks, stretched as they are, swing right round 'is crotch and plug up the bong...

...but miss piggy, being the piggy she is she sucked and sucked until she got stretch marks around her lips but she kept it up and cleared the plugged bong then kermit says....

[Zack1990]

wow my balls really hurt! But I can take it because...

[FUNK695]

i am man--hear me roar.lmao

[whipps]

i am man--hear me roar.lmao

..so kermit roared and miss piggy oinked, after awhile Kermit started to leap frog away....

[Zack1990]

and he could be heard to say, "Screw the sex change! I like my ball! As for me sack, well we can't win 'em all....

[polarbear67`]

i must interlude here - bravo to all - I think we are ready for prime time now - lmao

[whipps]

and he could be heard to say, "Screw the sex change! I like my ball! As for me sack, well we can't win 'em all....

...but little did he know he was dragging his stretched sack on the ground...

[Zack1990]

and Piggy spotted it and waved her pump heel around...

[polarbear67`]

and Piggy spotted it and waved her pump heel around...


then she started a swinging it like a carpenter swings a hammer - - whack whack whack on ole Kermits ball sack

[whipps]

then she started a swinging it like a carpenter swings a hammer - - whack whack whack on ole Kermits ball sack

...Kermit then swung around and tried to leap frog over piggys head but...ball sack on the snout and......

[Zack1990]

Piggy did shout, 'Gawd that smells like a foot with gout!' So she plugged up her nose and dislodged Kermi's sack and ...

[thuud]

continued to whack, whacking around as kermit's sack was back on the ground...

[whipps]

continued to whack, whacking around as kermit's sack was back on the ground...

...as he landed with a THUUD(get it) his own sack wrapped around his head dragging his nose to his butt......

[Zack1990]

Kermi thought, crap maybe I will get that sex change. But he collected himself and stood straight up and said...

[whipps]

Kermi thought, crap maybe I will get that sex change. But he collected himself and stood straight up and said...

.... wow I forgot I also got these new breasts now what do I do...then he started to squeeze his own breasts and.....(this is sick..lol)...

[Zack1990]

.... wow I forgot I also got these new breasts now what do I do...then he started to squeeze his own breasts and.....(this is sick..lol)...

... said maybe I'll just become a pez dispenser instead...


http://freesatfix.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=5752&stc=1&d=1210182412

[whipps]

[QUOTE=Zack1990;109000]... said maybe I'll just become a pez dispenser instead...
...kinda flat chested though, so now the flat again chested kermit could carry on ribbiting on his lilly pad in his swamp but.....

[

[Zack1990]

Piggy smelled candy and, toked to the hilt, she leaped to his pad and ....

[whipps]

Piggy smelled candy and, toked to the hilt, she leaped to his pad and ....

...toked..hungry..and horny the only thing she found was small and green.....

[polarbear67`]

holy , i left for lunch and nothing but a spiralling digretion into debauchery to be found here I see

[whipps]

holy , i left for lunch and nothing but a spiralling digretion into debauchery to be found here I see

Can't leave us alone for a minute.

[Grandmama]

Can't leave us alone for a minute.

Gads--I know was gone for a couple of hours and oh my.... poor Kermie

[polarbear67`]

Gads--I know was gone for a couple of hours and oh my.... poor Kermie


ya well when you are a skinny green thing yo tend to get picked on - lmao

[thuud]

ya well when you are a skinny green thing yo tend to get picked on - lmao

look at the geico gecco...lol

[polarbear67`]

look at the geico gecco...lol


I rest my case !

[FUNK695]

...toked..hungry..and horny the only thing she found was small and green.....
Piggy tried to smoke it, but did not burn very well(:eek:) and was still horney so she pulled out a jackhammer (:new_all_c)out of her purse and did her dead with kermi watching in the background.

[Zack1990]

then Big Bird arrived and did a mean tap dance, but Piggy realized that was just an hallucination, so, blaming Kermi for her stepped up high she...

[FUNK695]

found some schroom's and ate them all gone.lmao

[stretchie01]

but kermit standing tall told miss piggy

[thuud]

put my balls into your mouth and hummmmmmmm...

[polarbear67`]

put my balls into your mouth and hummmmmmmm...


there we go back in the ditch on this one - lmao

[Zack1990]

there we go back in the ditch on this one - lmao

LOl we are in the bilge though... LOL

put my balls into your mouth and hummmmmmmm...

[Kermi said] "a nice tune, maybe some Gershwin, and don't forget to pluck on the elongated sack". But Piggy, not at all a fan of Gershwin, decided to hummmm & pluck a Foghat song instead. To which Kermi exclaimed...

[whipps]

LOl we are in the bilge though... LOL



[Kermi said] "a nice tune, maybe some Gershwin, and don't forget to pluck on the elongated sack". But Piggy, not at all a fan of Gershwin, decided to hummmm & pluck a Foghat song instead. To which Kermi exclaimed...

....my balls are so sore today I'm going to need a longer song than that piggy so she.....

[CyberDavey]

....my balls are so sore today I'm going to need a longer song than that piggy so she.....

started singing....
This is the song that never ends....
yes it goes on and on my friends

[whipps]

started singing....
This is the song that never ends....
yes it goes on and on my friends

I was takin a trip out to LA tootin along in my chevrolet
Tokin on a number and diggin on the radio
When just as I crossed the mississipi line I heard that highway
Startin to whine and I knew that left rear tire was about to go
So I went as far as I could and when I stopped the car
It was right in front of this little bar kinda of a rednecked joint called the dew drop in
So I tucked my hair up under my hat and told the bartender that I had a flat
And would he e kind enough to give me change for a one
Well there was one thing I was sure glad to see
there wasn't a sole in the place except him and me and he just looked digusted and headed for the phone
Well I called up a station down the road a way, and he said he wasn't very busy today and he could have someone there in about 10 minutes or so
He said now you just stay right where your at and I didn't bother to tell the darn fool that I sure as hell didn't have anyplace else to go
So I just ordered up a beer and sat down a the bar and someguy walks in and
says who owns this car with the peace sign big back wheels and four on the floor
Well he looked at me and I damn near died so I decided I'd just wait outside so I laid a dollar on the bar and headed for the door
Now I was almost to the door when the biggest one said you tip your hat to this lady son and when I did all that hair fell out from underneath
Now the last thing I wanted was to get in a fight in Jackson missisipi on a Saturday night especially when there was three of them and only one of me
But they all started laughing and I felt kinda sick so I figured I'd better think of something pretty quick so I just reached out and kicked old green teeth right in knee
Well I had them all out there stompin and wretchin like their heads where on fire and their asses where catchin but I figured I'd better split before the cops got there
When I hit the road I was really wheelin had the gravel flyin and the rubber squealin and I didn't slow down till I was almost to arkansas
Well I think I'm gonna reroute my trip I wonder if anybody would think I flipped if I went to LA via Ohmaha

[whipps]

I screwed it up, I forgot a whole bunch in the middle..oh well to late now.

[Zack1990]

[tried to send you some rep points for that one ... but apparently I can't (the icon isn't working or something)]

[whipps]

[tried to send you some rep points for that one ... but apparently I can't (the icon isn't working or something)]

Thanks Zack, we had fun while it lasted, gave us something to do...lol

[polarbear67`]

are you saying this IS the end ?????? - hey Zack if rep dont work right click it and open it in a new tab. - A lot of pages here open with errors since the last Vbulletin upgrade and taht kills all the drop down menus

[Zack1990]

Thanks Zack, we had fun while it lasted, gave us something to do...lol

Yeah it was fun & funny... the oar lock especially. Poor Kermi, another hellish ride on the Piggy Show.

hey Zack if rep dont work right click it and open it in a new tab.

Thanks for the tip PB, I will do that now.

[whipps]

are you saying this IS the end ?????? - hey Zack if rep dont work right click it and open it in a new tab. - A lot of pages here open with errors since the last Vbulletin upgrade and taht kills all the drop down menus

No, not the end PB, just getting hold of my publisher, see if their interested...lol

[thuud]

No, not the end PB, just getting hold of my publisher, see if their interested...lol

don't be too greedy, just need enough for some more rum...:new_all_c

[whipps]

don't be too greedy, just need enough for some more rum...:new_all_c

Thats funny thats all they where offering, said the story wasn't long enough...lol

[boobs67]

hi,can some 1 help me ..i have a cs.6.and i want to get some uero channels,from all the one s are free...true fta,that is..how do i do that

[whipps]

hi,can some 1 help me ..i have a cs.6.and i want to get some uero channels,from all the one s are free...true fta,that is..how do i do that

Hey boobs your kinda in the wrong post, you need to post this in the coolsat forum to get a response, this post is just a little joke we had going.
Good luck

[polarbear67`]

hey whipps - I thought that was part of the story ffs - lmao

[whipps]

hey whipps - I thought that was part of the story ffs - lmao

Ya Kermit would probably like that

[polarbear67`]

Ya Kermit would probably like that



lmao thats fuggin funnny and I dont even know why !

[whipps]

lmao thats fuggin funnny and I dont even know why !

Crazy old furry....should have started a story about you......hey.... There once was a Big Furry Polar Bear... and you'll never guess what he did one day...

[polarbear67`]

Crazy old furry....should have started a story about you......hey.... There once was a Big Furry Polar Bear... and you'll never guess what he did one day...


ok thats enough of that - you guys dont really wanna know what I did one day - lmao

[whipps]

ok thats enough of that - you guys dont really wanna know what I did one day - lmao

Oh ya, does a PB shit on the ice or not...lmao

[polarbear67`]

Oh ya, does a PB shit on the ice or not...lmao



ha he tries not to because it steams through and makes a hole - lmao

[whipps]

ha he tries not to because it steams through and makes a hole - lmao

But at least you don't step in it that way.

[polarbear67`]

But at least you don't step in it that way.


hmmmmmm .... something to ponder for sure

[Vallarta]

what no goats in this story?........why......why....why....could have been a best seller

[whipps]

what no goats in this story?........why......why....why....could have been a best seller

....and so after a lttle while Kermit saw this GOAT sitting on the bank of the pond and he said......

[fijigrog]

....and so after a lttle while Kermit saw this GOAT sitting on the bank of the pond and he said......

thats gonna be some ride,i 'll ride that thing.the little frog smiled...

[slickblackcoupe]

wow my balls really hurt! But I can take it because...

we need to throw some asian hookers in here somewhere

[whipps]

we need to throw some asian hookers in here somewhere

...OK so right after Kermit saw the Goat, from behind the GOAT standing there was 2 ASIAN HOOKERS with the most beautiful...

[slickblackcoupe]

...OK so right after Kermit saw the Goat, from behind the GOAT standing there was 2 ASIAN HOOKERS with the most beautiful...

slanted eyes u could blindfold them with dental floss

[Vallarta]

and the best assets u'v ever seen.....they were both holding......

[Grandmama]

and the best assets u'v ever seen.....they were both holding......
Boxes for Kermie cause he's too short for the goats.

[whipps]

Boxes for Kermie cause he's too short for the goats.

...so as the 2 Asian Hookers held the goats back legs, Kermie climbed onto the boxes and all the sudden......

[Vallarta]

...so as the 2 Asian Hookers held the goats back legs, Kermie climbed onto the boxes and all the sudden......

someone yelled....."stay away from that goat" it's.........

[whipps]

someone yelled....."stay away from that goat" it's.........

.....really Dadss in a goat suit...oops, can't be Dadss likes bugs, so poor Kermie had to.....

[rriker111]

Riker's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Grandmama]

someone yelled....."stay away from that goat" it's.........

It's Miss Piggy in disguise and who wants to Pork her??!!!!

[whipps]

It's Miss Piggy in disguise and who wants to Pork her??

Riker!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!will................lol

[rriker111]

Riker!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!will................lol
yup ..I ain't proud...makin Bacon..lmao!!

[whipps]

yup ..I ain't proud...makin Bacon..lmao!!

So Riker in a horny frenzy pushed poor Kermit out of the way, he mounted Miss Piggy and was pushin and shoven and..............

[rriker111]

So Riker in a horny frenzy pushed poor Kermit out of the way, he mounted Miss Piggy and was pushin and shoven and..............
a game warden came along and said........let me give that a try so.....

[whipps]

a game warden came along and said........let me give that a try so.....

....so Riker, being in the frenzy that he was grabbed the game warden by the hair and told him to shove off until he was done. The game warden then said.........

[Vallarta]

....so Riker, being in the frenzy that he was grabbed the game warden by the hair and told him to shove off until he was done. The game warden then said.........

u'r lucky we're in the ozarks or u would need a licence to make some bacon squeel...u'l still need....

[rriker111]

u'r lucky we're in the ozarks or u would need a licence to make some bacon squeel...u'l still need....
a small farm animal breeding certificate so.....

[whipps]

a small farm animal breeding certificate so.....

.....so he put his small breeding tool back in his pants, turned and asked Kermit for the quickest way to town, Kermie smiled and said.......

[Vallarta]

.....so he put his small breeding tool back in his pants, turned and asked Kermit for the quickest way to town, Kermie smiled and said.......

man, that is a small tool.......just follow your nose....u can smell.......

[whipps]

man, that is a small tool.......just follow your nose....u can smell.......

.....those ASIN HOOKERS all the way here, so....

[fijigrog]

.....those ASIN HOOKERS all the way here, so....


kermit was in a quandry,he thinking if he needed rubber,he ddint know what he gonna do if the hooker got pregnant

[Grandmama]

kermit was in a quandry,he thinking if he needed rubber,he ddint know what he gonna do if the hooker got pregnant

If he needed that rubber where in the world would he find one that SMALL??

[whipps]

Ok boys and girls, here we go again, so there was Kermie standing there with.......

[clarak]

Ok boys and girls, here we go again, so there was Kermie standing there with.......

a nickle in his hand trying to buy a little finger condom at the drug store

[whipps]

a nickle in his hand trying to buy a little finger condom at the drug store

....until Kermie pulled out his dongle and the pharmist jaw almost hit the floor because...

[Grandmama]

....until Kermie pulled out his dongle and the pharmist jaw almost hit the floor because...

Even the finger condom won't fit so..........

[polarbear67`]

Even the finger condom won't fit so..........



it was back to the drawin board for lil kermie and his lil thingy.

[whipps]

it was back to the drawin board for lil kermie and his lil thingy.

.....little thingy, Kermi thought he was hung like a gerbal but guess not...

[polarbear67`]

.....little thingy, Kermi thought he was hung like a gerbal but guess not...


pooor kermie had a moment of clarity when he found out - much to his chagrin, that he was hung more like an ant

[whipps]

pooor kermie had a moment of clarity when he found out - much to his chagrin, that he was hung more like an ant

....ah another needle dick the bug fucker.......

[thuud]

and then Kermi said "I may have a needle dick, but my ass moves like a sowing machine...ha"

[polarbear67`]

and then Kermi said "I may have a needle dick, but my ass moves like a sowing machine...ha"


...... (not part of story) - thuud that was fuckin funny........

[whipps]

and then Kermi said "I may have a needle dick, but my ass moves like a sowing machine...ha"

.......I like that one......now back to Kermie...lol

[Zack1990]

... so out came the needle and on went the thread and kermi said, "sheesh if i tie this tight enough right round the head, I just may....

[whipps]

... so out came the needle and on went the thread and kermi said, "sheesh if i tie this tight enough right round the head, I just may....

.....squeeze it big enough to look like I was hung like a gerbal, then Miss Piggy can......

[Zack1990]

...exclaim, "kermi! you got the goods now using that needle and thread, so let me start giving you some much deserved head!" But Kermie said 'Wait...

[polarbear67`]

...exclaim, "kermi! you got the goods now using that needle and thread, so let me start giving you some much deserved head!" But Kermie said 'Wait...


......a minute there Miss Piggy if you are giving head i want some of that curly pig tail

[thuud]

so why don't you just turn around so I can make you squeal like a pig...

[polarbear67`]

so why don't you just turn around so I can make you squeal like a pig...


just like i used to do back stage at the Muppet show

[Zack1990]

...you know, in the broom closet with Fozzie, Gonzo, Beaker and the Swedish Chef... But Piggy said ...

[polarbear67`]

...you know, in the broom closet with Fozzie, Gonzo, Beaker and the Swedish Chef... But Piggy said ...


ya but when I was with animal it was the best!!!

[thuud]

And with that, Kermi was motivated and decided to give her the ride of her life...

[Grandmama]

So he started up his Harley then.......

[Grandmama]

Then ole kermie said........WTF I've been sittin' here revin' my engine for 13 days waitn' for ya...and with the cost of gas these days...

[whipps]

Then ole kermie said........WTF I've been sittin' here revin' my engine for 13 days waitn' for ya...and with the cost of gas these days...

........in thirteen days I could have driven from Ontario to Clagary and back a couple times, but then Miss Piggy looked at kermie and said......

[Zack1990]

After all this time you better not be premature! And Kermie said...

[Grandmama]

Not a chance..I got that blue pill...

[fijigrog]

quote=Grandmama;119242]Not a chance..I got that blue pill...[/quote]

and a big pump